The Other Side of Service

Doing good is it's own reward. Do unto others. Charity is the pure love of Christ. Idle hands are the devils playground. These pithy sayings are jack-hammered into our heads from birth. And if you have a mother that was a believer in them, you were indoctrinated while still enfolded in the womb. What we aren't told about is the other side of service. Being served. How often I have restrained myself from asking for help because I would appear "weak". How I would go without food, or PG&E because I was too "proud" to ask. This isn't about asking the church for help, this is asking for help with ANYTHING. I wouldn't even ask for help from my family for fear of getting harassed, teased or having some perjorative title hanging over my head at all the family functions. I'm not making this up. For example, one time I borrowed $200 for whatever reason and I was invited to stay for dinner. My brother-in-law remarked "Man, that's one expensive dinner." Implying that not only were they giving me money but in essence, they were paying me to eat it and it was SO EXPENSIVE. I try not to even ask any more, and even when I do, they can't afford it. I never ask why. I was raised to not ask for help, not to rely on anyone, yet also raised to believe that family will always be there for you. Just one of the many paradoxes that sculpt my mindscape.

I had no other choice but to go to the Bishop and get help for the family. I was unemployed, my sister was barely employed and my Mom had, once again, dropped her basket (to coin a phrase). I was sitting with the bishop, trying to explain what we were going through, that I wasn't weak, that I'm not stupid and that things just happened and though I didn't prepare like I was supposed to, I was in a bad place. He just smiled and told me it was okay, and that it was even more okay to ask. See, everyone has the giving side of service down to be on the other side of service and allow others to serve you is something we all have to learn as well. Unless we are humble enough to accept help from those offered, provide the service opportunity for friends and family we will never learn to be humble enough to accept the loving service from our Lord and Savior. He has provided us with the greatest of gifts and unless we accept it through taking covenants, through prayer and fasting and through both sides of service we will never truly have the fullness of that gift in our lives. To put it simply, Christ has purchased our eternal abode and by humble acceptance of this will we have our home in eternities future. Service is how we will decorate it.